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In Jamaica, the phrase ‘bruk man nuh mek sense’ resonates within societal structures, reflecting widely held beliefs about the prerequisites of relationships and intimacy.

This mentality, rooted in both cultural and socio-economic factors, dregs up the complexities of modern Jamaican dating and relationships.

The evolving economic situation in Jamaica, once defined by chronically high unemployment, has significantly influenced societal norms and expectations from both men and women. 

Understanding why women are seemingly opposed to dating below a certain tax bracket is essential to grasping what influenced this mentality that has become synonymous with Jamaican women. For many Jamaican women, financial stability is not just a preference but a necessity.

Throughout this article, the focus will be placed on the three categories that came from the responses given by 10 Jamaican men and 10 Jamaican women of varying ages, occupations, levels of education, and backgrounds.

Here are their responses:

No bruk man…ever

Question: Would you date a broke man or a man with little money?

“It depends on how broke,” said 30-year-old Sheree. “I’m okay to build and grow with a person. So you may be out of a job, but his mind is not broke; therefore, he is willing to try different ventures and opportunities to generate an income.”

“But you can’t not have anything and not want to work, but you want gyal…dat nuh work,” she added.

Thirty-five-year-old Ramona shared similar views, stating: “Only if he is broke temporarily, between jobs… but if he just broke, and broke is his way of life, then no.”

“I would not date someone who is broke long term…maybe something happened like medical bills or school, but nobody that I would have to mine (take care of), no,” she added.

No brukniss…not at my age

Question: Would you date a broke man or a man with little money?

“At my age, no,” said 27-year-old Shadean. “Age is telling. Men mature later than us, so if a man reaches a certain age and you see no changes, then he simply won’t change.”

She made a point to focus on age, citing that it would be very hard to start over with a broke man at her age. Shadean, who is married and a mother, noted that a “man at my age should be empowered.”

“There is no way I could ever date a broke boy! In this economy? At my age?” said 26-year-old Deb. “I don’t understand what men don’t understand, or even some of these women. I’m not saying I won’t have my own money, but what are you bringing to my situation? Sex? That cannot work.”

These responses were particularly poignant since these women cited age as their reason for not wanting a broke man. It can be deduced that once women get to a certain stage and age in their lives, they find it harder to want to build and grow with someone.

Men either understand or are vehemently against it…

Question: Women want men with money, so sex, intimate relationships, and companionship are tied to the amount of money you have to offer. How does this make you feel?

“I don’t feel any way about it, and I like that women are allowing us (men) to take advantage of them,” said 36-year-old Kevin. “Yeah, I get some action… I’m good once I get some ‘front’ but for relationships… in general, I don’t support a woman being in a relationship with a bruk pocket man.”

“It’s white-collar prostitution,” said 39-year-old James.

“[It] makes sense. Given the economic value tied to men saying they desire to take care of the one they are with…why can’t a woman then lay out what she needs for a man to take care of her?” Anthony (25) said.

“It’s prostitution with extra steps,” said 29-year-old Roy. 

“I’m not gonna try pursuing anyone unless I have money; that’s just a personal thing; relationships cost money to start,” said 27-year-old Raj.

“It’s fair, I suppose… but if that is the premise that determines whether or not you have a relationship with that woman… prepare to be objectified and used,” said 32-year-old Red.

Mo’ money, mo’ problems

“The more money a man has the more likely he is to cheat, he has options, so you’re setting yourself up for failure,” said 19-year-old Nate.

Nate emphasised the reason that a lot of the women who prefer men with money end up single parents is that these men do not often stay with one woman. Abuse is also a major issue in a lot of these imbalanced relationships where the man is the breadwinner and the relationship is seemingly more transactional.

These men also have a harder time finding genuine connections due to never truly knowing the woman’s true motives.

The crux of the matter…

Historically, the role of the male as a provider has been ingrained in Jamaican culture. This traditional view has grown and changed in response to contemporary economic pressures, reinforcing the expectation that men must possess financial resources to be deemed suitable partners. 

Given the responses from my very limited, albeit eclectic group, both men and women seem to agree that you cannot be broke in this day and age—and economy—and try to date someone.

For many women, financial stability in a partner translates to a better quality of life and protection against economic hardships, while for men, they want to be able to provide all of that. Yes, there is a set of men who believe it to be “prostitution with extra steps,” as Roy puts it, but I do believe we have to be fair when we analyse the mindset of both sexes in this matter.

Simply put, money does matter to an extent, and those who require it in their relationship are, quite frankly, allowed to do so.

We all, at the end of the day, have standards, and whatever those may be, they should be respected.